May 26, 2015

We Watched Interstellar....

We watched Interstellar last night.  I couldn't help but say things like "Alright Alright Alright, we're gonna take this spaceship to another planet..."  In my best Matthew Mcconaughey voice as I was putting the DVD in.

I thought it was good.  I'm not a scientist so I couldn't say whether the science was bad or not but most of it pretty much made sense to me the way it was presented except for a couple little things.


When they realized that because of the time difference that the doctor on the water planet had probably just crashed when they got there I thought that they should have been something they took into account before they wasted the fuel/time to go there. also, why were a handful of planets next to a black hole ever even considered viable homeworlds?

And when you come in for a landing and crash into ice clouds and see nothing but tundra I figure it's a safe bet to count your losses and head for the other planet.  Sorry crazy Matt Damon. Also, you think there would be the technology to communicate somehow with the base camp before they land. Initiate the deep sleep wake up  routine remotely, then have open comms with the doctor and even be able to upload research data.  without even landing. Or even leaving orbit.  They're sending video messages through a fucking wormhole from earth still but they have to land in an unknown environment and physically find the doctors?  They should have set up an unmanned orbiter that they could have been beamind the research data to in real time. Then beam that out so it can be received as soon as they come through the wormhole
.  Seems like the data they DID get was minimal and useless if they actually had to physically go there just to see what's up.  

Also... wheat died out but they're kicking back drinking beers. There's a plague but trees line main st. It didn't seem that dire.

Also, while he's sending the data on interdimensional gravity manipulation via dots and dashes, which, and again, I'm no physicist,  would probably fill 5000 notebooks and take a a million hours to transcribe he could have included "Hey Murph, this is your dad.." somewhere in there.

Basically, Plan B works, she goes to the other planet, sets up a baby factory and the human race flourishes on the new planet who I assume studied the black hole that is nearby for many years and figure out how to manipulate gravity and created the wormhole... which made their own existence possible in the first place? I think I just found a time travel paradox...DAMNIT!  I know it's not real time travel but it kind of is since he's communicating with his daughter in the past. Time travel never works!

But otherwise I thought it was entertaining.

May 13, 2015

Dont Sample the Whistle Key Chains

Retail Adventures

As I come around to the main aisle following a trail of spilled coffee and I see a middle aged Latino or Native American man of short stature at the reading glasses display. I'd noticed him before wandering around other parts of the store, not really looking like he was shopping for anything in particular.  Along with his height I notice his hair is messy, his basketball shorts and wifebeater tank top are ripped and dirty. He's also wearing a bomber jacket that looks like it's been crumpled up on the floorboard of a car for a week.  Usually when someone like this, unkempt, shifty, aimless, is in the store they get a second glance. It's probably profiling but usually hunches turn out to be right and they end up stealing something.  Having free coffee tends to attract more of these people than we'd like, but it's a nice thing to offer our customers. 

He's got on a pair of reading glasses and on his tippy-toes trying to stand high enough to see himself in the little mirrors provided by the store for customers to see how different glasses look.  They are set about chest high on an average height person, and they are adjustable but he insisted on balancing on his toes to see his reflection while holding a dixie cup of coffee, spilling most of it out on the floor in front of him, and all over himself.  He notices me and looks up with a wide, stupid, toothless grin and giant bug-eyes from the magnifying reading lenses and says "Hawdo I look?!" I paused for a second to think to myself 'like a scumbag moron' and said outloud in my friendly customer service voice "makes you look smarter"  because that's what people say when you try on glasses right?

I left him to his spectacle shopping and walked away but kept an eye on him as he continued through the store.  He still had the glasses in his hand but his other hand was hidden by his jacket sleeve and it looked like he was trying to conceal something in his shorts. His right hand was under his shirt as he walked around.  It was time for my lunch break so as I left, I asked another employee, we'll  call him Jason, who has sort of become our unofficial, self appointed theft prevention officer.  It's not his job, and isn't qualified for it and it takes away from his normal responsibilities so I probably shouldn't encourage him but he's into it. 

When I return from lunch I ask about the suspicious individual.  "So did he end up stealing anything"  Jason says something like "not that he saw but went on to tell me what happened"   Or unofficial security officer isn't very subtle when it comes to tracking potential shoplifters and many times they get the hint they are being watched and either just leave or confront the accusation.  This time the guy got a little antsy and said something like "hey man I ain't takin nothin, why you watchin me"  and at that point Jason mentions how he's been hiding something under his shirt.   The man then explains that he has a zit on his ass that he's been trying to pop. Jason was speechless.  This guy may or may not have been stealing but at that point he didn't care. He told him to go wash his hands.  He follows him to the bathroom and waits for him to exit.   The individual is taking his time, definitely more time that it takes to wash your hands.  Jason goes in to check on him and see's what can not be unseen.  The guy has his basketball shorts halfway down his legs, bent and twisted over in front of the mirror trying to pop the pimple on his butt with both hands.

"Oh come on man!"  Jason exclaimed and then tells him to pull up his pants and get out of the store.

The rest of the day all the employees are recalling him from earlier and taking mental notes of all the things he touched in the store with his dirty butt zitt hands.  As a general rule I do not recommend testing out the whistle key chains. Ever. I once saw an old homeless woman pick up one of every color and blow into them one at a time.  Add reading glasses and several other things to that list.  

May 10, 2015

Here's Where Your Stolen iPhone Ended Up.

Yesterday on my lunch break.
I've always seen the cash for phones machine at the mall but never really thought much about it because I don't have an iPhone and when I'm done with phones they have very little value. But yesterday I noticed that most of the time I see people using it, it's scumbags. Then I started thinking about it... ECOATM... So like, you put a phone in and get back cash instantly? How is this not a haven for phone thieves? Surely they must verify that the serial number matches the owner somehow right? Turns out no. Not really. 

A quick search landed me here.
Mugged for a phone that wound up in an ecoATM, on Baltimore Brew website

Here's an interesting excerpt
...There’s no way to determine the phone’s owner during the process. All ecoATM asks for is a valid id that resembles the person performing the transaction.
For that matter information about the phone that could help determine ownership is not captured during the sale. The seller doesn't have to prove that they can unlock the device, the device doesn’t even have to be powered on...
I wonder what the stats look like for phone theft in cities with and without EcoATM's?

May 5, 2015

What I've been watching on the internet

because you're dying to know. 


Comedian Louis CK TV show. 

All This Mayhem 
Documentary. Aussie Pro Skateboarder Papas brothers rise and fall in pro skateboarding. 

Halt and Catch Fire
AMC TV drama about an upstart in the mid 80s PC wars. 

Marvel's Daredevil
Netflix original series about a blind superhero Daredevil. 

Alex Winter (Bill from Bill & Ted) directed documentary about the rise and fall of the file trading website Napster. 

Atari: Game Over
Documentary follows the birth and the eventual death of pioneering home console developers Atari and the search for and myth around the "grave" of game cartriges buried in a landfill. 


There Will Be Quiet - The story of Judge.
VICE/NOISEY 4 part documentary chronicles the beginnings of Straightedge Hardcore band Judge with interviews leading up to a band reunion concert. 

One Man Metal
VICE/NOISEY in a 3 part documentary they track down and talk with illusive Black Metal solo artists.  

The Secret History of Cabbage Patch Kids
VICE talks to friends of the original creator of what would become Cabbage Patch dolls and how she was totally ripped off. 

Until The Light Takes Us
Documentary chronicles the history, ideology and aesthetic of Norwegian Black Metal - a musical subculture infamous as much for a series of murders and church burnings.

The Ingenious Design of the Aluminum Beverage Can
Quick video of exactly what you think it is. 

youtube channel of Micheal Stevens. 
pretty much every video by this dude. 

youtube channel of Marques Brownlee
reviews of tech with a focus on cellphones and tablets.