So I went to Italy.

So I just selected these from my Google Photos and they seem to have plopped in here out of order.  Anyway.  Here are some photos.  We had an amazing time.  

Creepy entry to our Naples AirB&B.  Inside was super posh but the people who lived on the ground floor would just chill in plastic chairs and smoke cigarettes all night. They had a little dog who would shit and piss on the stairs.  

Last night in Italy rage in Naples. 

The Fanta in Italy is amazing.  I drank about 100 of them. 

Street Pizza, as one does.  The pizza place Pizzaria Da Michele is kind of famous. They have two things on the menu.  Pizza with sauce and  Margarita pizza.  

We got the Margarita and it was amazing.  We ate ours at a bar across the street. 

They mummified Alligators in Egypt  

and people of course.

"Sole of a mummy"  lol

I guess this is guts of the mummy. 

swoll Hercules. 

This was bonkers. Of course I took a bunch of photos of it. 

This glassware wasn't found in an estate sale. It's from fucking Pompeii.  

Special  bazillion year old floors require special shoe covers

we found the hidden painting!  

Mt. Vesuvius 

Babà  Mt. Vesuvius 

This was some tube pasta filled with a meat sauce, cheese and raisins. Deep fried.  holy shit. 

This place claims to have invented the Margherita Pizza in 1889 or something.  That place has been there since fucking 1780.  We did't get in.  

Fried pizza.  it was good but I wasn't totally into the "broccoli" which was more like spinach. 

This Maradona motherfucker is like god in Naples.  Holy shit. His face was everywhere. Literal shrines to him all over the place. 

Popped into a local metal band show in Naples.  That was wild.  haha. 

So these are real teeth from some poor fucker who died at Pompeii.  

Pompeii was kind of bonkers. 

tons of dick stuff. 

Pompeii house, paintings on the walls and mosaic floors still intact in a lot of it.  bonkers!! 

so much street art.  Check out my instagram for more of that @kirkiscool 

The pizza, guys.  Indescribably good.  It made no sense being that good.   

Last night in Rome I got some wild boar dish that was off the charts. 

I call it "the first supper" 

homeboy Rembrandt. 

Whoever painted this ripped off Adobe Illustrator's box art. 

tons of super weird Jesus art.  "gimme dat blood!"  

Hilarious he's wearing a perfect photo-copy version of the shroud of Turin before he even died.  
stupid ass Catholics. 

Her face tho.  "gimmedat god bluuuuuddddd" 

ahh there he is.  No trip to Italy is complete without seeing this famous pee pee. 

And da butt. 

This is just across the room incase some dudes are feeling like they might have turned a little gay from looking at David. 

and of course all the important bits captured in souvenir magnet form. 

They had a musical instrument museum. Here's a Stradivari violin. 

I found the drums.  They don't let you play them tho. 

Gallileo's middle finger

so much amazing pasta dishes in Florence and Rome. 

it's me again.  On a rascal. 

Tuscany/Chianti region looks just like Napa/Sonoma Ca. 

Florence sunset. 

we took a wrong turn trying to get to the sunset lookout and randomly passed by this place where Galileo observed some moons of Jupiter or something in 1609.  

so many meat plates.  So good. 

this 15th century chapel with fresco was in our Florence AirB&B.  it was totally sealed off tho. 

Rome at sunset. full moon! 

looking through the Aventine Keyhole 

The line for the keyhole.  Thanks a lot, Rick Steves.  It's said that since the keyhole is on the door to the Malta Embassy you're seeing 3 countries.  Italy, Malta and St. Peter's Basilica which is in Vatican City (a sovereign nation)

tucked away in a random neighborhood church is a sculpture my Michelangelo 

No hoochies  at church.  

one of the best and most simple sandwiches I've ever had.  Porchetta FTW. 

Pantheon built by ancient Romans in like 30bc to honor the pagan gods, then the catholics came in like 600AD and turned it into another stupid church. 

They say never buy water in Rome because these free, fresh spring water fountains are everywhere.  They're cold and delicious.  Although this one was a bit creepy.

yup. 

Some Italian cars.

when we got there some people were drinking from tall skinny beer glasses.  We all remarked "those are tall"  so when they asked "large or small beer" they all said large.... but the large was REALLY large.  They all finished them.  I had a Fanta. 

they displayed the different levels of ancient floors they found when remodeling this museum. Everything is just old shit built on top of even older shit.  The history there is just mind boggling.   

some fucking hilarious street art.   

Very popular take-out American style burger/chicken sando spot called PUOK.  Every night there was what we dubbed a "PUOK PILE" at the one trash can in the Piazza there. 

"Working on the edge, losing my self-respect

For a man who presides over me...."

menu doodles

St. Peter's Basilica in the Vatican City.  These motherfuckers had donation boxes in here.
The fucking nerve. 

I asked them what they were doing and they said "NUN of your business"  JK I didn't talk to them. 

Didn't get molested at the Vatican. 

The holy urinal at the Vatican.

Y tho?

Dali

Raphael 

"I'm back, bitches!" 

 it's me when I dont get a haircut or trim my beard for a while. 

A cab driver said they stole this Pyramid from Egypt and put it back together.  I think he was full of shit. 

first view of the Colosseum from the taxi. our apt was just around the corner. 

Rome AirBnB was in the basement.  Ceiling looked like we were in the bottom of a pirate ship.
Anyway. this was me taking a load off after almost 20 hours of travel.