Oct 25, 2022

McDrive-Thru faux pas

It's been a while since I posted a good ol' fashioned fast food Noggins.  It's not because I don't eat it anymore.  I'm a fat ass for a reason.  Just that nothing really interesting happens as much as it did when I worked in the hood.  The McDonalds and the Jack In The Box on San Pablo Ave were a guaranteed Noggin worthy visit.  It was like a TV show.  Use the desktop version of this page and use the search box: search for Fast Food, Jack In The Box or McDonalds and you'll be entertained.  Pardon my pre-woke early 2000's language.  I have learned.   

But this isn't about that.  
Circa 2015. I'm surprised they don't have a more recent Streetview.  


Today I had 3 mins before I needed to be at work so in a complete lack of urgency I decided to stop into the McDonalds drive-thru for some brekkie to-go.  That 2 for 5 Sausage Egg McMuffin deal has me by the fucking cheek meat if you know what I mean.  This particular drive thru has been updated and has two order lanes.  This is such a great idea, especially for when shit like what I'm about to tell you happens.  I've complained on here about drive-thru etiquette before but this is a kind of new one for me.  New because I've never had the drive-thru clerk call out a shitty drive-thru customer before I could. 

 I pull up and there's a car at each order menu screen but then as I'm deciding which one to pull into the car on the left pulls forward... YOINK!  that's where I go.   Since the other car was there before me I always try to get my order in before they finish but since they're already there it never happens.  But today I ordered my usual and kept looking over but they were still there so I move ahead to the pay window.  When I get there the lady working says "Some people shouldn't be allowed to use the drive-thru.  It's supposed to be fast, it's a drive-thru.  If you want to take your sweet ass time just go inside"  Apparently the car I was side-eyeing while ordering had been there for like 10 mins and she told me they said they  "were just browsing the menu"  She went on hilariously "this is a drive-thru you don't get to browse!  We're supposed to get each car thru in two minutes. These people are screwing up my line"   She was singing my song!  I wish I had a Noggins business card to give her so she can read all my drive thru complaints.   I said that the drive-thru should be seen as the 15 Items Or Less line at the grocery store.  It's there for expediency.  If you've never seen a McDonalds menu before, or like ordering for a family of 10... put some shoes and pants on like a grown-up and go fucking inside!  We shared a laugh then I got the fuck out of the way and went to the pick-up window like I'm supposed to.  I still did a rear-view mirror check tho to make sure I wasn't holding up the line... of course I wasn't. Those fuck-heads still haven't ordered yet. 


Circa 2018. lookin like 2032 

Oh, wait.. there she is.  After the space ship remodel sometime around 2017.  So weird all the McD's, TacoBells, Starbucks etc all got updated to look like the building was beamed into a flying saucer, blasted to planet Futuristic and got beamed back like a cafe on a hipster space station.