I got a New Phone!

hey its the office annual xmas bash today. that means i get a random gift from a co-worker that may or may not know me. the name i pulled out of the hat just started working here and no one knows anything about her. I hope she likes Starbucks because thats what she's gettin!.

here's the pics left over on my old phone. She was a good little phone but it was time for an upgrade.

Skate buddy and amateur naturalist, Steve found this Martinez Tree Crab last weekend at the skatepark.

and now here's the pics from my new phone!

This is my new phone!

that "Baby It's Cold Outside" song makes me think of date rape. so i drew this comic.
(click for full size)

from pencil to photoshop

i got stickers!

Sarakara

I didn't. shh

yes, these are my gnarly foots

El Chile Jalepeno's in Oakland is the chronic son.

there was a wreck

Imaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagination.

PAKISTANI RESTAURANT ("Jerry, you are a verry BAD MAN")

Happy Holidays from the noggins. I pissed in the Egg Nogg.

my brother was messing around in MsPaint i think and made "X Mas Noggins Monster" Freakin' sweet, thanks Bri! getting some skills man!

Will Smith vs Vincent Price.

I bought this movie for $1 during Halloween. A classic Vincent Price black & white spooky time movie called "The Last Man on Earth" It was another one of those last-man-on-earth movies. When I started seeing previews for I Am Legend recently, it reminded me of that old Vincent Price movie.

Let me just say that I havent seen I am Legend yet, but the synopsis sounds pretty much the same.


1964
Dr.Robert Morgan (Vincent Price) is the only survivor of a devastating world-wide plague due to a mysterious immunity he acquired to the bacterium while working in Central America years ago. He is all alone now...or so it seems. As night falls, plague victims begin to leave their graves, part of a hellish undead army that''s thirsting for blood...his!

in the movie: Morgan spends his days sending out desperate radio transmissions hoping to hear another human voice.

in the movie: Morgan uses his own blood to create a vaccine to try and help the victims



2007
Robert Neville is a brilliant scientist, but even he could not contain the terrible virus that was unstoppable, incurable, and man-made. Somehow immune, Neville is now the last human survivor (as far as he knows) in what is left of New York City and maybe the world. For three years, Neville has faithfully sent out daily radio messages, desperate to find any other survivors who might be out there. But he is not alone. Mutant victims of the plague -- The Infected -- lurk in the shadows... watching Neville's every move... waiting for him to make a fatal mistake. Perhaps mankind's last, best hope, Neville is driven by only one remaining mission: to find a way to reverse the effects of the virus using his own immune blood. But he knows he is outnumbered... and quickly running out of time.


based on this, sounds like a shoddy Will Smith remake. Way to go Hollywood, yet another remake/rip off.

THE LAST MAN ON EARTH (1964)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058700/

Holiday repost.

this was originally posted on my old Myspace blog November 07, 2005

OK so its Halloween night, about 7:45 and you think to yourself, ... "shit, that bag of Snickers Minis i bought 3 weeks ago is gone..
must have ate it all myself" you grab your keys and jet out to the local WalmarTargeRiteAidGreens to pick up a bag or 2 for the trick or treaters
that will be showing up soon. You run over to the Halloween section over where the BBQ gear is in the summertime. But when you get there, you stand
confused and wonder what happened... did i accidently run through a time warp on Isle 5 and not know it? How the fuck is there Snowmen, Santas and Tree Ornaments
on display at 8:00 Halloween night?

Appearently, no one told me, but corporate America stopped celebrating Thanksgiving and Christmas starts early. REALLY EARLY. You've got to be fucking kidding me. Not one Turkey.
not one Native american racial epitaph. not one Orange or Brown leafy pinecone thingy.

and its not just Walmarto, I went to Micheals, the arts & crafts place, to get some arty supplies and its Dec 22nd there too. WTF? you'd think surely you'd see some orangy brown pinecone-
pipe cleaner creating supplies on display there..nope. its all fake snow, plastic holly plants and gold paint. Not that Thanksgiving is the mother of holidays but shit... is it just me
or is it worse this year? Maybe its a reflection of our greedy nature.. The Giving of Thanks just isnt as profitable.

so get out there the Christmas buying fest has already begun!


this time of year i like to repost this holiday message i wrote back in 03.
Holidays and commercialism

on the eve of (insert holiday here) celebrations i am reminded of a rant i posted on a message board . someone asked if holidays were getting too commercialised.. focusing on x-mas mainly.. i went at it like this..

...I hate how they try to make you feel bad if you dont spend money...

with Chiristmas, Chanukah and Easter and you could even say St. Valentines Day are the worst, mainly because they have the whole religion thing. You arent a good Christian(or Jew) if you dont participate. thats a lot of pressure... youre obligated to participate.. kinda like "The Passion of The Christ" what a great idea.. make a movie a majority of the population is spiritually obligated to like... and then to top it off, (going of subject) a movie the rest of the majority is spiritually obligated to see so they can criticize it! GENIOUS!
Let me go back to Christmas, its especially bad i think because its almost become "uncool" to not celebrate it... sucks if your Jewish because Chanukah traditionally (commercially) has been made out to suck. sorry for all the other religions, you just weren't cool enough.. but there is a maket for everything.. may not be as big, but companies will find you.

What do bunnies and eggs have to do with Jesus? for that matter what do Pine Trees and Santa and the elves fairy tale have to do with Jesus?

Easter is plenty profitable... CANDY for one is HUGE... baskets, basket fillings, eggs, egg coloring kits, plastic grass? all the toys and stuffed animals, bunnies & chicks galore! and some people even give easter gifts... like it was Christmas!

Easter is up there with X-Mas as far as commercialism.

other big commercial holidays i think of are Halloween, Thanksgiving, 4th of July(US), Cinco De Mayo and St. Patrick's Day.
ok so if your Irish or if you drink you are obligated to participate in this. Be a good Irishman and get sauced on green beer... or your a bad Irishman. and any holiday is a reason to sell alcohol!!

Thanksgiving, hmm welll what more do you need than American Pride. and what says family togetherness better than a bunch of orange and brown and yellow nick nacks and turkey paraphernalia? im not even gonna go into the Genocide and Fake american history aspect.

4th of July and Cinco De Mayo... ok again how can you be proud of the independence of your country without buying a bunch of red white and blue crap.. and explosives!!! Cinco De Mayo is the same except its a bunch of insulting mexican stereotypical Americanized crap. I guess we can throw Chinese New Year in this section too... why discriminate.. theres money to be made on them too!

and Halloween, well i dont know of any real reason we celebrate this holiday... but theres a ton of companies making a killing off of this holiday.. this is the holiday where you're supposed to get the chance to change who you are and be someone else.. but everyone else is doing the same thing... its like what "Hot Topic" is .. but the rest of society gets to do it on this one day. listen to "Halloween" by Dead Kennedy's Jello nailed it.
anyhoo, i guess if you dont dress up or have the scariest house on the block on the 31st you arent cool. go buy orange and black crap.

and Valentines day... god i hate this one... I'm gonna add Anniversaries in this section. Love should not be judged by jewelry or flowers. or Scooby Doo valentine cards in my 4 grade classroom.

there are other holidays that are commercialized that are falling under the radar

like....

FLAG DAY! "go buy flags or you're a terrorist!!!"

mother and fathers day... its usually just a card but there is commercialism there... and after all, love isnt love without a Hallmark Logo.

Labor Day and Memorial Day, all the stores make sure to take advantage of our "day off" of work... all those sales they have. "you have an extra day off.. and its the weather is nice.. go out and shop, or buy things to enjoy your day... like lawn chairs and BBQ's!"

and how could we forget about everyone's own personal holiday... BIRTHDAYS!! make sure you buy the right gift or your kids will hate you(similar to Christmas) but also theres a ton of plates, streamers, hats, place mats, whistles, etc etc etc with your kids favorite cartoon character on it..
its disgusting...

all of this is disgusting. just go to the stores... just by the color of the store. it changes with the seasons! you can tell what season it is by the crap they are pushing on the ends of the isles.
appreciation towards an event should not be defined by how much crap you buy.

****
and here's something i posted in 04. before they skipped thanksgiving.
the holidays part 2

me: happy monday!
friend: haha :-)
me: whats new?
friend: not mucho... how was your commercialized thanksgiving? :-)
me: alright, there were no spills breakage or fights .. pretty cool
friend: ya know... after re-reading your rant on commercialism of the holidays I actually agreed with you..
me: cuz its true, it dont mean we cant enjoy the holidays. just kinda puts a stain on the whole thing
friend: ha.. well yea.. but it made me think about what people would think if I didn't buy them something for xmas.. I know my family wouldn't care 'cause they know i'm poor right now.. but certain people would be dissapointed if they didn't get something in a certain dollar range
me: yeah thats another fucked up aspect of it
friend: or I'd feel guilty that I didn't get them something in that certain dollar range which is stupid I know
me: it creates this greedy expectation and puts a dollar amount on love
friend: totally...
me: my mom always says "i dont want anything" because she knows we love her and doesnt need bought things to make her feel secure. but we do anyway..
some families are like, they buy things they think people would need or enjoy.. things with personal connections to the individual. other families are like, you buy things because you're supposed to and they will be pissed off and guilt trip you for not loving them if you, not only not get them something, but the particular thing they wanted, and most likely asked for directly or heavily hinted at. take this year for example.
someone i know's mom totally needs a new couch. she is very picky and it was a pain in the ass going to every furniture store in town, trying to find one they thought she would be happy with.. but the problem is, she didnt ask for a couch.. they took the initative to do somehting nice like spend $700 on a couch she NEEDS instead of waiting for the hints of what she really wants..
which means a whole lot more 'cause they were thoughtful enough to get her something she needs..that they noticed, not something that they had to be told...so the day after they finally decided on a couch and bought it, they said "you promised you will like and use anything we get you this year" last year they got her a nice ass mixer wich she hasnt used.. not only not used but, still used her old ass broken one instead. ok so they said "mom, you have to use it" then thier mom says "like a Rotisserie?" so they think "now were fucked she wants a rotisserie cooking thingamaJig".. she's gonna be pissed about the couch... she'll politely give thanks, but make snyde remarks throughout the year about how she could be using her rotisserie for this dinner. thier family is whacked
friend: haha.. that is fucked tho
me: thats why i like my family.. we dont care we're just laid back and are happy to be together
me: thats why when people ask "what do you want for xmas? " i dont say anything.. or i say i dont know.
friend: 'cause if they knew you they could figure out what to get ya?
me: yea that, and because what i really really want is a govt that doesnt lie, and world peace, and absolute proof of intelligent alien life and a time machine
me: basicly i want to be happy and worry free.
friend: same here..
me: that cant be wrapped and put under a tree tho.
me: so ok i'll settle for more socks
me: they should ask "what do you want thats in realistic means to purchase that my income status will allow"
friend: you can never have too many socks..they disappear literally, I'm convinced of this
me: when i was a kid i was convinced there was a black hole to another dimension somewhere near the dryer at my parents house.. because i would lose things.. not just socks but toys and other shit.. i always remember it was in the laundry room the last time i saw it.. it just dissapeared.
friend: haha.. yea...
me: wierd

Learn For Real.

Hey everyone. I've made a decision. I've decided that I hate the Guitar Hero and Rock Band video games. If you don't know what i'm talking about, you live in a cave.

I was at Best Buy last night xmas shooping and could hear the clickity clacks of some dudes playing the new "ROCK BAND" game on the next isle.. i went around to look and i decided i would suck at it because I PLAY DRUMS FOR REAL.

There was a part in a song that had an 8th note single stroke roll on the snare.. and did the game make you play that? NO.. fucking lame.

no kick drum, no cymbals.. its just like the Guitar Queero episode of Southpark.


So, just like Randy Marsh, if you know how to play for real you'll hate it. its the same feeling i get with snowboarding.

learn to play for real..for crying out loud. Is that how lazy kids are now that they'd rather fake playing on some air guitar karaoke game where they can be mediocre at pushing buttons and get digital cheers from a fake crowd than actually trying to learn how to play for real.. oh yea that requires more than an afternoon of playing around on a toy.. where REAL guitar required actual practice and discipline.

And for the record.

Playing Wii sports is not exercise...even if you break a sweat.

Being hella good at Tony Hawk Pro Skater doesn't mean your a skater in real life or that you can even stand on a skateboard without eating shit.

Just because you can gleefully gun down innocent people in Grand Theft Auto doesnt mean its ok to do it in real life. no matter how depressed you are.

go outside.

fuck.


UPDATE: I played drums on Rock Band last night and now I hate it more. fuck that piece of shit game.

Happy Birthday Dad!

My, alcoholic, chain smoking Dad is 57 today. dude chill on that shit.
here's some pics of my dad, Dave.



Here's a wonderful memory we both now share.
My Dad Is Savage


ok now on with the Friday Photo Madness.

Congrats on the McSkillet, Ron.

new digital micrometer! hello 2008!

pink hello kitty. shoot me.

thats frost on my car this morning. WTF california?

my ghost

I love you Dad. As for the rest of you... fuck off!!

Skateboarding Update

I finally dropped in at the Martinez skate park. when i re-started skating about a year ago, i tried dropping in there and ate shit hard. ever since i've had this weird mental block/fear about dropping in there.



I've since dropped in on ramps of comparable height at Livermore, Benicia and Berkeley. (and the gnar bowl at the bulb)

Between my new confidence from those parks and egging-on from my bro's at the park, i finally did it Sunday morning.

SO STOKED! now i just have to learn how to pump and carve correctly.

thanks peer pressure!

"PRICE CUT" My Ass!!

So I'm at Target last night to get some things. I needed a new black ink cartridge because my girlfriend is printing law school info and applications and papers like crazy.

anyway, I see this "PRICE CUT" tag hanging off the price for my particular ink cartridge and get all excited.




there's even a new price tag hanging over the old one that says "Now Only...". So like any savvy consumer I lift it up to see how much they "CUT" the price. this is what i saw.



what the fuck? They didn't cut shit. I'm pissed.

Fucking Target, never trust the French.

skateboarding all day!

today was a full fucking day of skateboarding..

Met the Martinez regs Jesse and Marco at Martinez at 7am.. drained 4 inches of water from part of the park, then skated till around 10:00.

then Marco and I met jacbli76 in Albany where we hiked thought busted trails and Burning Man Junk sculptures and got lost in some crazy ass place called the bulb. finally found the bowl about an hour later... cleaned out more water and junk from that then skated that for a bit. I fell a lot...But i did get in a few front-side grinds! that bowl is teh gnar tho. so rad.

then we headed to the Berkeley park for a quick skate. It was my first time there. I mostly watching people skate better than me.

I'm tired and sore as fuck but it was way worth it to meet a fellow S&B bro and skate some cool new places.

here's Marco cleaning the bowl





the random ass shit there.



peace out! more skate tomorrow.

Storm of the Year

Well 2007, thats all we could muster up for ya. last night was the biggest storm for the bay area all year. All the hype from Seattle and Oregon just made this shitty storm we had seem like a leaky faucet. If it makes you feel any better, I stepped ankle deep into a puddle last night.


Rain is annoying. good news is, chains are required in Tahoe. get out your strap on and hit the slopes!

here's some damn pictures.














see ya. I guess i wont be skateboarding this weekend. fuck off.

Is Kelly Pickler smarter than a 5th grader?

The answer is NO. NO NO NO. Hell fucking no!! Thats almost like a trick question because really she isn't even smarter than a 3rd grader. Having her on that show was pretty much pointless. "Hey we should get that American Idol star Kelly Pickler to be on the show" "You want us to put HER on a show called "Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader". thats like putting a 5th grader on a show called "Can You Beat Up Mike Tyson"

Obviously that conversation never took place because we have this golden gem of Americana to enjoy.



If you think Kelly Pickler is a sharp lady, you might be a redneck.


AMERICA, FUCK YEA!



happy monday.