Jul 31, 2009

Bartventures Part 3 the Finale.

Since I'm done with this job, sadly, there will no more Bartventures. So here's some memories from Bart.

For the last week there's been these black people, a family I think, dressed in suits sitting on the same bench at the Bart station every day holding up these binder/folder things. I've ignored them all week and didn't make eye contact in case it was something they were selling. Today I looked, and apparently they are selling something. Jehovah. They just sit there, silent and hold up Watchtower and Awaken magazines. What the fuck is the deal with religions that need to push their shit on everyone else. Fuck goats if you want to but don't try pushing your fucking bullshit on me. So creepy, just sitting there like fly paper, hoping someone walking by gets stuck.
how fucking pathetic. It's like they're obligated by their church to do that for a certain period of time or they wont get into heaven. I didnt know God needed a street team. (see Mormonism)

Also, at the same Bart station, two benches down there's a group of mentally challenged people waiting for the bus. They are rad. After Micheal Jackson died one of them was singing 'Beat It' but all retarded (pardon the phrase) "Beatit. Beatit.... Beatit, Beatit" no rhythm or melody. Bless him for the tribute tho. Today he was doing MJ dances. Also, there's two down syndrome women that must have gotten make-overs because they're all made up and shit. Rock on bus stop tards.

I've seen two business class little people. Today there was a really fat middle aged D&D nerd sitting two seats from me reading 'Runelords" and I think he farted. So gross. Part of me wishes it was the cute lady sitting in front of him, but odds are it was him.

A week ago my home-bound train came and it was overflowing with people so i said fuck it and waited for the next one. When that one came it was crowded too but I was like "I just waited 15 minutes for this one, I'm squeezing in" the driver came on and explained that there was an accident on one of the lines and they were backed up... then like three minutes later came on again but I think he was trying to contact the central office. "Can we get some station announcements about the delays, I've got a bunch of pissed off passengers on my train" oops lol. there was a light chuckle throughout my car. I made a joke but no one laughed. I guess theres an unwritten rule about contact with people you dont know on the train. so lame.

I think that's about it. No fights or drunk people. Just tired workin' folk.

Oh yea, to all you asshole 20-somethings that sit in the old people seats and dont ever get up. FUCK YOU! some punk ass hipster made a pregnant lady stand up. lame.

Thanks for the memories BART.

2 comments:

T said...

What joke did you make when the BART driver made the erroneous announcement?
I hate that BART etiquette bullshit of no eye contact and no conversation. I mean I get it, but damn, loosen up people.
I think you covered the gambit of offending everyone in this last one.. tards, jehovahs witnesses and nerds with intestinal overload. Oh my

Lauren said...

UGH, I had to take BART many times while pregnant and no one let me fucking sit down either. I get that MAYBE they couldn't tell if I was fat or pregnant, but for a long time, it was REALLY obvious that I was indeed fat AND pregnant.

Weenies.