The Curse of 255 16th St.

It's Cursed

As some of you may or may not know, ever since I moved into my house there has been a dilapidated vacant house next door. I've written about kids from the near by high school sneaking into the back yard to do whoknowswhat.  And how I have to be the mean old dude on the block and constantly call the cops on them. (I get a secret pleasure out of it) and how for about a year it seemed like the happening spot to discard baby paraphernalia. Used strollers, cribs, car seats etc.  I think I narrowed it down to the crazy daughter of the guy across and two houses down. She is crazy. Another neighbor had a restraining order against her for screaming at his kids and dancing on his car in the middle of the night naked.  Apparently this all went down before we moved out here. But anyway, she had a miscarriage, which sucks, but for the first couple months we lived her we saw her pushing a baby in a stroller...we found out later that it was a doll. and that she was crazy. Back to the curse you all came her for. This fucking empty fucked up house.

The lady that lives on the other side of the cursed house likes to get all the 411 on everyone around here. She's like the E16th News Gazette. She told me everything you just read just a minute ago, she also knew the last tenants of 255. She told me just know...I know! after living here for 4 years she just now lays this knowledge on me... she said that the woman who lived there was a 77yr old who'd lived there most of her adult life. She died of cancer in the house. Her adult daughter moved in with her to take care of her before she died. This pissed of her deadbeat husband who ended up leaving her after the mother died. He was like "fuuuck you bitch stay there if you like it so much" (im paraphrasing) so in the wake of her mothers death and husband being a douche, she ended up offing herself with pills and booze a few months later. IN the house... curse!


The adult son now took over the property but didn't want to live there. He had a friend or someone he knew help him try to sell it. During this time the son died of what appeared to be a suicide but there was some suspicious circumstances surrounding it. curse! 

So then, a young adult grandson of either the daughter or son inherited the property. He decided he was going to fix it up and live in it (and sell and possibly make drugs which led to the garage burning down (hence the new section of fence I had to build to replace the burnt shit they left).  One of the first things he needed to fix was the plumbing. A good friend of his came to check it out. He looked over the pipes and agreed to help. He got on his motorcycle rode off to get supplies and had a freak accident and died from a broken neck at the end of the block. CURSE!!!!!!!!!   


No one has really been in the house since. It's been at least 5 years. A couple of cops came when the front door was open one time. I wonder if they are any of the cops that were killed in the line of duty a few years ago?  It's just too freaky to think about.

Every once in a while a guy hired by BofA will come and chop down weeds and board up windows. but this time the paper that is usually taped to the window says that its for sale.  I'd love to invite anyone to come and clean this shithole up so my property value increases .003 percent, but now I'm not sure if they will survive THE CURSE of 255 16th St.

Christian Rock? Fuck You

In response to a guy looking for a drummer. Other than the Christian band part it seemed like a cool band idea.

-I don't believe in christian music. It's not a genre. It's some bullshit lifestyle label that limits the diversity of the lyrics. I play drums loud and hard but I'm very anti religious. I'll never understand why any band would want to single themselves out like that. Faith should be between you and your "god" not on a bumper sticker.

Then he replied with some shit about it being a post looking for like minded musicians. 

"Like minded"? if you could keep religion out of it. My old band played a festival that until that year had previously been a Christian music festival. We had a ton of people digging us until they asked if we were a Christian band. When we said no they were like 'meh'...

I learned the word secular that day.  It shouldn't be a thing.  Just be a fucking band. All the bands I've ever been in were nondenomiational normal bands. But we never felt like we needed to put it in our description of the style of music.

If you dont like people spouting on about their beliefs or lack thereof, then stfu about your religious bs description of the type of band you are . It's really annoying. Labels like that are completely unnecessary in this context. Be Christian be whatever. Just keep it out of band descriptions. Too bad if you would have just said "heavy band" you could have had a kick ass, drug/alcohol free, experienced drummer who has no criminal record and is in a long term committed relationship. But you had to go and label yourself and segregate potential prospects.

To this day I will never understand how something could completely take over every aspect of someone's life. 

Lol "Christian Rock" what an oxymoron. 

God Bless America

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I totally pwnd a stupid Nickelback fan on the internet. Now I feel awesome.

So a dude posted this picture on G+. Hilarious right? A few of us chuckled and joked, because Nickelback in fact sucks. My first comment was "The sad part is that guy was there to see the opening band.... Creed" But a couple people disagreed and tried to defend Nickelback and started spouting nonsense about the constitution giving them the right to say what they wanted about their opinions.  "because it says in the constitution that you cant do things that effect the freedom of others" WTF?

Then he said..."if you dont like it dont listen to it" My response was "Knowing they exist and that there are enough people with horrible standards for music that this band got popular is what makes me feel the way I feel. Turning them off doesn't change this."


There was a bunch of back and forth with this guy and a few others supporting the fact that Nickelback sucks. I bit my tongue and stayed out of it because I knew I would just go off. But then they pulled me back in. 
"Nickelback is mindless noise fed to you by the music industry. It's very simple in arrangement which makes it easy for the masses to listen to. They have a cheesy cliché rock image which the simpletons eat up. There is nothing of value. This isn't an opinion. It's fact. The fact that you like it just makes you someone who is easily amused. There is nothing wrong with this per se but it is a microcosm of the ultimate dumbing down of society. Which is probably why you don't understand that the constitution doesn't say you can't do things. It says that the government can't tell you that you can't do things. The Constitution does not give you rights. The founders considered your rights to be "God-given" or "natural rights" — you are born with all your rights. The constitution does, however, protect your rights by: Limiting the powers of government by granting to it only those specific powers that are listed in the Constitution; (This has not proven to be effective oflate.) Enumerating certain, specific rights which you retain. These are listed inthe Bill of Rights - Anyway this is why Nickelback sucks."



That wasnt clear enough apparently. 
He countered with: "It's still your opinion. Only something that can be scientifically proven can become fact. Since the subject is about belief, it is merely opinion no matter how many words you throw at it. I think they are a really good band that have really good, meaningful lyrics. That is why i like them. So i guess that's it. We have discussed our opinions so there is no reason to argue :) "



Then I got all deep. 
"No I pretty much proved they suck. You can add most of the top 40 in there too. It's more product than music. But rock acts like Nickelback are all interchangeable. They aren't groundbreaking in any way. You may like the sounds they make and the words they sing but it's because you're supposed to. Just like you're supposed to like the taste of cola cola. It's sweet and bubbly but it's still horrible for you.  It's this knowledge that allows you to make the decision to continue to be a victim of the machine or stand up and realise what the fuck is really going on. So with that being said you should be able to say that despite the knowledge that Nickelback, britney Spears, creed, Kanye, Taylor Swift etc are totally the suck... You still like the mindless sound products they produce. Just like while I know coke rots my teeth, I still drink it because I enjoy the bubbles and sweet cola flavor." 
That pretty much shut him down.

After that it turned into a conversation listing music that didnt suck. It reminded me of the list of my Ten Albums I'm Still Not Sick of. (in no particular order) post from a few months ago. That inspired me to create a playlist to go with that list on my new favorite music app/site 8tracks. Check out the playlist below and check out my 8tracks page for more mixes I've created.

Songs From Albums (I hope) I'll Never Get Sick of. from kirksucks on 8tracks.

Great Fast Food Movie Moments

Here's some of the best [that I could find on youtube] Fast Food movie moments. Why? who the fuck knows I was bored. ENJOY!!!!!!!!!

Coming To America


 Waynes World 2



 Super Troopers


 Dude Wheres My Car


Demolition Man


Pulp Fiction 1: Royale With Cheese


Pulp Fiction 2: Big Kahuna Burger


Pulp Fiction 3: 5 Dollar Shake


Harold & Kumar


American Beauty


Half Baked


Fast Times At Ridgemont High


Critters 2


Big Daddy


UHF


and my personal favorite....
Falling Down


If you can suggest more [and they are on youtube and allow embedding] let me know.

My problem with Alcatraz (the tv show)

Alcatraz review

There's a new show by the assholes that made Lost. It debuted last night on Fox. Basically what it's about is all the inmates in Alcatraz disappeared in 1963 and was covered up. They begin to reappear in present day San Francisco.

It starts out on present day Alcatraz with a little girl who veers off the guided tour to find a man waking up in a solitary confinement cell. The tour guide thinks he's a bum or something sleeping there. The guy ends up being one of the 1963 inmates. The show then flashes back and forth from the 60s telling the backstory of the inmates much like on Lost. So the inmate manages to easily get on the ferry back to SF without any problems where he hunts down and kills people from his past and mysteriously a guy he has no connection to.

Present day cop (token hot chick) teams up with. Hurley from Lost (Awkward comic book nerd and phd Alcatraz expert) get mixed up with super top secret govt agency apparently formed to catch the time traveling ex-cons. They have a "Bat Cave" under Alcatraz. Who knew!?



Problem I have is that you have this super high tech heavily budgeted group that clearly knew enough about it to have a underground team with high tech computer monitors and as we find out, a super secret high tech prison under a forest somewhere set up to hold the "63's" (which for some reason has old school prison cell bars instead of modern day heavy sealed doors). Despite all this they didn't have the wherewithal to investigate reports of a guy sleeping in an off-limits area of Alcatraz. Or realize that they reappear in present day, on the island itself. So what I think should happen is, once you use your high tech shit to deduce that the situation with the little girl and person 'sleeping' in a cell happened the same day the former Deputy Warden was murdered why not use your obvious pull to have Alcatraz shut down for emergency maintenance and just wait for them to appear. It makes no sense to me.

Im sure the connections with present and past get bigger and the top secret rabbit hole goes deeper as the show goes on but this, right now bothers me. I bet they never even reveal how Hugo got the nickname Hurley.

posted from Bloggeroid

Tips for a Happier and Bacteria Free New Year

After you piss on your hands, or get shit particles on your hands from wiping, what's the last thing you touch before washing your hands? The sink faucet. So in theory that's gotta be one of the dirtiest places in the bathroom right? Strangely, it's also the first thing you touch after you wash your hands. Good job, you just touched the shit handle with your virgin hands.

There's new hands free technology that's been popping up in the last several years but I think it's implementation has been a little off. Here's my rundown.

*Electronic Paper Towels?* Pointless. Because the only hands that have been touching it are most likely freshly washed. I feel stupid standing there waiting for a paper to come out of a machine while my hands are dripping . The manual ones have paper towels ready to just tear off. Tear it off and go! Im drying *clean* hands!

*Automatic Soap dispenser?* While this may be the only step between bodily waste and the sink i dont count it because c'mon you're about to wash off whatever might be lurking there. And plus, it's fucking soap.

*Hands Free Flushing?* I can dig the hands free flushing, only because it's convenient. Sometimes while shitting it goes off prematurely and scares the shit out of me. Literally.

So business owners, if you're going to make anything in your public restrooms _hands free_ make it the sink. If anyone actually put any thought into it, as I clearly have done way too much of, they would see that, while its modern and neat, it's pretty pointless unless you're handicapped. But more importantly, unless you have automatic sink faucet, you aren't saving anyone from getting herpes or aids from the bathroom.

Also a can of Lysol next to the toilet will do way more good than those flimsy pointless ass gaskets.

Here's to a happy and cleaner new year.

posted from Bloggeroid

Tipping.

Tipping
I hate having to tip. But for some reason super low wages have become acceptable and I'm forced to pay for your wages directly out of my pocket.

If you met the status quo at your job you shouldn't get a reward for it. This sends the wrong message and punishes the customer rather than tackling the issue with employers.

How are they getting away with paying their employees far under minimum wage? What if you went to the department store and after they rang you up they tacked on a optional 18% fee to supplement the cashier's $3/hr wage? You can refuse to pay it but an entire industry would rather guilt trip you than try to change an illicit practice of violating labor laws.

Can you write off tipping as a donation?

Does this make me an asshole?

posted from Bloggeroid

It's about that time. Xmas shirts

Happy Almost December fuckers. Just a reminder that I have some alternative Christmas tshirt designs for sale on redbubble.com.
http://www.redbubble.com/people/kirksucks

posted from Bloggeroid

Not So Ghetto Jack in the Box?

So now my beloved ghetto jack in the box, of which many noggin posts have been written has been totally remodeled. I posted before when they did a slight cleanup but this is like a total update. The parking lot was full, there was a line of well-to-do lunch break goers, and I did notice the hint of any illicit substance in the air fouling the aroma of deep fried tacos, seasoned curly and burgers being made after they were ordered. Not one scumbag asking for change next to the register. Not one argument between the staff and an unruly, ignorant customer. New chairs, tables and an actual counter where there used to be bullet proof glass.

They've really classed up the joint. It's great for business and for the Jumbo Jack enthusiasts of the neighborhood but it makes for boring stories not worth telling. Sorry noggin readers. I'm afraid the mountain spring of awesome ghetto jitb stories has run dry.

posted from Bloggeroid

Cha Cha Cha Reservation Fail

So like i love this place but tonight they are kind of pissing me off. We got a reservation for 11 people. As we sit we mention that were still waiting for a few of the eleven people in our party, the waitress says... not the hostess, not the person at the front who greeted us, not the person on the phone who we the made the reservation with and called 3 times, once to make the original reservation, again to add 2 extra people and again to say were running late, and at this point still there was no hesitation or indication of any problems with our reservation, but as I was saying, the waitress tells us "they told you that we have a large party of 30 coming in an hour and a half right? So you'll need to be done by then" -What the fuck is that shit? 


We wrangled 11 heads and dragged them out here from the 925 for this place we'd been talking up and now we look like assholes. You had 3 opportunities to tell us this information BEFORE we drove across the bay, and 2 more once we were in the building and after most of us are here the waitress drops the oh yea you have 90 minutes to order, and eat then GTFO bomb on us. 


Also, no separate checks, and since you're getting 18% tip automatically because we had 'more than 8', don't try and earn it. Fuck you. The speaker blasting Latin bass in our ear in the loft is awesome too. It's even better when you cram 11 adults into a table for 7. Like I said, I love this place but maybe never make reservations or sit in the loft again. Shit its after 9, let's see how they kick us out.