Jul 22, 2008

Alice...you're dead to me.

This local Soft, Alt, Rock, 90's and Today station has a morning show that I listen too. It's anchored by Sarah who's been on the show for years and 6 years ago they acquired former Rock radio DJ "No Name" to take over some crack heads spot co-hosting with Sarah. He was a total high tempered Metal head in a punk band and was a great contrast to Sarah and added some balls to the Lillith Fairesqe radio station. They have relationships with many celebrities that sometimes come and fill in for Sara or No Name during vacations. The Sara and No Name show was #1 for a long period of time, and even had a local TV show last year called 'Sara and No Name After Dark'.

I was a loyal morning commute listener until today. After the 4th of July week long break they come back on only to announce that they fired, No Name. Their explanation? So they could be a fruity tooty vagina morning show. "to cater to our target demographic of 25-44 yr old women" and disregard a large portion of its listeners.

Every time I'd tell people I listened to Sara & No Name they would balk and say "why do you listen to that gay radio station" and I'd have to defend the fact that Sara is rad and No Name is a bad ass loud mouth metal head that brings out the rock slut in Sara. But now station management has just lived up to every stereotype that No Name (and Matty the producer that just left) worked hard to break.

One of the morning show side kicks on live 105 (competitor Alt rock station) went over to Alice to do a live audition (which they're doing till they find someone) and Live 105 was simulcasting it.. so I was hearing Sara and Human and stuff on Live105's morning show.. it was weird. after it was over they just started talking hella shit saying they were all quiefs and whiners. I took offense because I still like Sarah its not their fault after all. But that's the image the station has and like I said, is now trying to live up to for some lame reason.

These decisions are being made some corporate exec douche think tank in NY that probably never listened to them and one day decided that their target demo needed to be cunt rags and alienate everyone else.

I think the whole morning show staff should quit, call No Name and take the show somewhere else. to a radio station that doesn't play cunt rag music all day. But they wont because everyone is so afraid of not rocking the boat. If they did leave I'm sure they'd be blacklisted and never work again.

The listeners (you) don't mean shit. its all market studies and shit. its all on paper and charts and payola from labels. If you ever wondered why the radio sucks, that is why.

Thats why Fingertight (my old band that was on Columbia Records) never got radio play. We went to radio stations all over the country meeting DJ's and program directors. They all loved us, loved our CD, some were big fans, wore our shirts, came to shows when we were in town. But then the sound scans came in and we saw we weren't getting any spins in those markets. When we went back to a few of them they told us that they have no say in what they play. The Program managers at the stations were pissed they couldn't add us to their play lists because they got the lists from corporate offices in NY or L.A. (which apparently included reruns of Nirvana and Chili Peppers)
More on that here; boycottthemusic.blogspot.com

Has to do with Payola and record sales or some bullshit.. its stupid. radio play is supposed to determine a bands popularity .. it shouldn't be the other way around.
no WONDER people have such shitty taste in music, because its dictated to them.

Every week almost every station had a "cage match" where the DJ got to pick new artists and have people call in to vote on them. that was where our 1 spin, per station a week came from .. consistently. because the DJ, godforbid actually got to pick the bands, and we kept winning the cage matches. Because godforbid the listeners actually got to voice their opinion.

The music industry is full of itself. They don't give people what they want. They tell them what they think they should want and then force them to like it. Dumbing down everyone. and THAT's the thing that really pisses me off about this one local high school station KVHS. They have the full freedom to be independent and play local artists, but they want to be a REAL radio station so bad they follow the ass-fucked format radio standards that the corporate radio stations go by.

KVHS was the station that, despite our local popularity, snubbed us constantly. Even threatened to file a harassment claim on us because our fans called in so much and bitched at them for not playing us. simple solution.. PLAY US.

Anyway, bad move Alice Radio. The morning show was the only reason I even listened to that station. After 10:00 they played pussy fart music. Now they're going to have a tampon of a morning show too. You're dead to me.


Heather said...

We have a fucking bad ass radio station in Boise... I love every DJ, and every song they play. I'm sure they are being dictated just like all the rest but luckily for me I like it. I might kill someone if they change their format. xrock.com

Anonymous said...

oh what the fuck. that is some serious bullshit... i listened to their morning show for the same reason... cause No Name was a bad ass and complimented Sarah well... and promptly turned off the radio as soon as Alice started playing their usual rotation of bad chick rock.

goddamnit. that sucks.

jimbizzle said...

G2K got the same bull shit for KVHS. Fuck them! Music sucks!

Wanna join my Kazoo band?

Target Addict said...

I totally agree: Alice Radio is dead to me, too. For an eye opener: go to YouTube and type in "Sarah and No Name" and you'll get links to their After Dark TV show. I sampled about 8 random episodes (out of 60 or so) yesterday and they all showed the same thing: NO NAME CARRYING THE ENTIRE SHOW. Seriously, each ep. contains segments of No Name doing a funny riff or telling a silly story (or at least something interesting) and stupid 'ol Sarah just playing along to his lead. He WAS the show, and without him, Radio Alice is nothing.

Anonymous said...

KVHS is such a steaming pile of shit these days. I try to listen to it when I'm in the car, but they just keep choosing music that's worse than last year on a steady scale.

I wonder if "You have bad taste in music" is still up. Funny website on the small chance you've never been.

Hitomi said...

Oh mighty Kirkness, I so agree with you! I moved out of the country in June and for shits n giggles logged into the Alice website only to find to my dismay that Matty and No Name were gone. Then, to make matters even worse...I saw that cranky crackhead douchebag Vinnie was back and thought, WTF! I'm still rinsing the barf outta my mouth...there goes Alice's cred (again). Glad I'm not there to have to listen to that shite talking idiot they brought back. Rock on bruthah!

Anonymous said...

That show was a massive queef before and it's a massive queef now. Here's the deal: No Name was a DJ on Live 105 for years, The DJ With No Name, and during the same timeframe on Alice, the show was The Sara & Vinnie Show. Now, Vinnie was, at the time, a loudmouth drunken party asshole who was more interested in getting tore up than working, so they fired him. No Name auditioned, and became the new host. And the proximity to Sara made him suck massive balls. Seriously, he was way more awesome on Live 105, I could barely stand him on Alice. Fast forward: he's too out of control for the station's demographic (true) and Vinnie had gotten sober and responsible, so they canned No Name and got Vinnie back. So, the show's back to sucking just as bad as it did back in the day, and No Name now hosts "KOFY Creepy Movie Time" on SF channel 20 on the weekends, and it's an awesome show showcasing terrible C-list horror movies of yesteryear while he and some gargoyle dude host. It's damn awesome, go check it out and get your No Name fix!