BLOG!

I knew my misguided anger and pessimism would pay off eventually. I think I just got the validation i've been looking for. A reason to keep on bloggin'. (as if I really needed one)

here's a conversation i just had.

Dude: i just got 2 emails in a row. one from patch perfect and the other from grassy seed

Me: are you on some kind of Lawn mailing list?

Dude: i dont even own a lawn haha... i want u to write a blog about LAWN spam
Me: no... why dont you?

Dude: im not a blogger
Dude: when i complain people just call me a baby, when you complain people think you rule.

oh man that is the best thing i've heard all year! so to oblige "dude" here's a blog about LAWN spam.

Why the heck do you get spam from crap you dont need, or ever had an association with? I know its all random and stuff but doesnt that defeat the purpose of target marketing? When your target is "everyone" then your solicitations become annoying and instead of people seeing an occasional ad for something they're actually interested in, they see an inbox of shit and a delete button. Another female friend of mine is always wondering why she gets Viagra spam all the time. she's like "I dont even have a penis" ... ahh but one day you might and one day that penis may be a little on the limp side.. I doubt thats the Viagra spammers intention but hell you never know right? fuck did i just defend a Viagra spammer?

Its not just spam tho, its also the good ol' fashioned telemarketer sales calls. Somehow, somewhere I got put on a Mortgage, Home owner call list. (I'm pointing my finger at you Todd) and while I dont nor have ever owned a home or even inquired about it, i get calls all fucking day long about "my mortgage" or "saving me money on my house payments" FUCK OFF and do some god damned research. Luckily, I hardly ever answer my home phone and when i do my monthly checking of my messages its always 50 recordings of a telemarketer halfway through his/her pre-recorded schpeal. My friend Jer loves to get calls from people trying to sell him shit. He likes to get into some made up goofy character mode and keep them on the line as long as possible without ever actually commiting to any sale. One time he pretended to be some old gay guy who was in the middle of making love with his new and younger boyfriend when the phone rang. The sales person was doing everything to get off the line without being rude but he just persisted and yelled stuff like "hey not now Honey Pants, I'm on the phone" Jer rules. (rita take note, this sounds like something you'd be into)

anyway.. now I'm all pissed about telemarketers and shit. thanks.

I hope you all think I rule and that I'm not a baby for bitching about this.