take that, snack machine!

I put my money into the snack machine at school to get some Funyuns. I'm already apprehensive because this machine never gives change. It's like DVC is paying for thier new Book Store 15 cents at a time. fuckers... anyway, since i was paying attention to the change thing, I was excited to hear the "plop plop" of my nickel and dime. but then realized i didnt hear the sound of my chips falling into the bay at the bottom. as i look my Funyuns are hanging by a thread up in the dispenser. I yell loudly, "You gotta be kidding me!" scaring the freshman girl getting a soda. I slammed and shook the machine thinking to myself, the one time i get my change, they still fuck me by not giving me my chips. I hit and shake violently some more. the girl next to me is getting nervous. I say "what the fuck? damnit!" then as if God heard me or something, a bag falls. but its not my chips its lame ass pretzels.. as i've blogged before, no one likes pretzels. so then i shake some more and i can see my Funyuns wriggling from thier coily springloaded grasp... clunk! HA! sweet retribution! not only did i get my change, i got my Funyuns and FREE pretzels! even tho i hate pretzels, I enjoyed those damn salty sonsa bitches like they were the best pretzels i ever ate!

That warm onion flavored breeze you felt graze your nose last night at around 7:00pm pst. was the wind of justice for everyone who's ever been ripped off by a snack machine.