Jun 28, 2006

job of eternal stench

ok kids, everyone gather around the fire, I have something you need to hear.

Imagine, if you will, a 20 gallon container of pig shit. not just regular pig shit but the ass end of filtered pig shit. Where I work we make industrial filtration systems, and one of the things people use our machines for is pig shit. one pig farm can produce an unthinkable amount of pig shit, or "waste" as we like to call it. so how our machines work is you pump the liquid pig shit (it IS liquid by the way) into one end of the machine, this is the feed as shown in the diagram below, and on the other end it comes out clean water or permeate. practically drinkable although we dont suggest you drink it. Some crazy Canadian pig farmers were so juiced (no pun intended) that the machines worked so well they drank it. then our field tech puked.

Amazing, I know, for more visit our site www.vsep.com. but theres also another thing that happens. all the shit (pardon the pun) that comes out of the water to make it clean comes out in a concentrated cake which is essentiall 100% pure concentrated pig shit. this is what was in that 20 gallon container i was talking about.

now, open your minds a little further children. now, this container of concentrated pig shit, shit has been on a shelf for about 5 months, fermenting and aging like a good wine or a fine cheese.

well, someone in the warehouse found this container and decided it needed to be dealt with. so they exhumed it from its resting place, opened it and dumped it into the drain.

guess what our whole building smells like still, 2 days later? thats right, a dead fat 60yr old guys shitty colon cancer man-ass. and the thing is if they arent pouring something like this down a drain they are running tests on it. so it pretty much stinks here all the time. one of the worst things they tested was burnt human sewage from Japan. thats all im gonna say.

air sickness bags are located in the pouch below your tray tables. thank you have a nice flight.


jimbizzle said...


Anonymous said...

The pig shit container has a sticker on it that has a date and message:

"do not open till december 25th 2007" Christmas.

Is that a joke that was an adtion via photo shop. Or for real. I cant tell. If its not a joke then why would they open it. Better question why open it at all?


Kirk said...

well anja, that container is totally photoshopped. its not even the real container. I later found out that it wasnt 20 gallons of pig shit that stunk up our building, it was only 16 ounces. and they opened it because from the fermentaion, it was starting to swell up and bulge. so they had to open it so it wouldnt explode.

radness. thanks for reading.